February – the time of the year where love comes into main focus.
Are we a generation of lost love?
The stereotypical gentleman is far and few, but then where are the ladies for these gentlemen? Men will do what a woman will allow them to get away with, so if one let’s him degrade her, is he more likely to see this as a general consensus. But if he dates a woman who respects herself, a man will have to respect her. He will then learn what type of woman will be a good time fun girl and which will be a woman whom he could be with and potentially marry.
We are creatures of learned habits. As children when we are told not do something repeatedly, we learn not to do it again. Same goes for adults, we are constantly learning throughout our lives. In new friendships, relationships and work. We learn what we can and can’t do.
So do males no longer feel the need to live up to the stereotypical male roles as females have come so far in equality and feminism empowerment? Are we no longer allowing men to treat women, with love and kindness as we can now do it all for our self’s. We don’t have to rely on a man to pay our bills or bring in the food money. We can do it all, be the breadwinner, raise our kids and have a life.
A culture of ‘hit it and quit it’, sidepieces and links mixed with get what u can financially and store evidence. Now I’m not saying these have never been around before, but with social integration being so net based, it seems more visible to be commented on and joked about.
No one seems interested in the picture of the loving couple, they get enjoyment out of seeing half naked girls taking pictures for likes, and screen shots of people getting turned down or exposed. Or the picture with ‘bea’ but you can’t see their face as their girlfriend might find out.
It’s almost you can’t be seen doing something nice unless it’s for your wife, but even this isn’t a barrier that some women respect. We always known men will try their luck, but women these days seem so much brazen in getting the man or the money.
Does it all stem from heartbreak, resentment and bitterness.
It seems the norm for the younger generation to have a ‘main’ and a sidepiece. Commonly mocked on social media, but I have heard of girls who accept this, how can any woman who respects herself, be wiling to be in a relationship as a ‘Main’ and know that her partner may have or does have another girlfriend basically, are they trying to sugar coat it? If a man loves you, there isn’t any other woman he should want, if he can’t be faithful and loyal, he is not deserving of your time, body, energy and most of all love. Basic instinct is what dives a man to spread his seed, but love will allow him to understand that yes one day we will all be dead but I do not need to sleep with every female to ensure my species will live on. But this instinct is just what it is, basic and humans have evolved and we have knowledge.
I wonder because some single mums have not experienced how a partner should treat them; are they unable to show their kids what a loving relationship looks like? Will they hold bitter resentment for their child’s father and then pass on the inability to love and be loved. To say a man should not be wrapped up in his woman because she didn’t raise him like that, does this stem from what she did not receive? I believe both partners should be wrapped up, under thumb, whipped with each other. This way you do both compromise, if I only one person always compromised, the relationship will not work, truly. This can pass down many generations and not be fixed. Thus creating more single mums with the inability to show what love is. But then there is the woman who was strong enough to say I’m leaving because this isn’t how I deserved to be treated as a partner and the mother of your child. We learn what we think is a ‘successful’ relationship from our parents. If they stay together but are not happy and hurt each other, we will think this is the norm, this will likely be the relationship you will end up in and be content with. If a child is constantly seeing either parent with a flow of the opposite sex, are the more likely to have a string of partners?
Or is it just we don’t any focus on love anymore. It seems everyone wants to fool around, no strings attached. Lay down with a woman but have no intentions of being a father to a child that may be conceived. It’s seems like we’re so comfortable with becoming single parents. I think having a child is a far bigger commitment than getting married. If the marriage doesn’t work you can get a divorce in our western culture, if you want too. Go your separate ways and never have to see each other again. But have a child and you are tied to each other for life. When the child gets ill, gets married or has a child themselves. Of course the are the exceptions where farther and in cases mothers will not have anything to do with their child. These people should have more proactive in making sure they didn’t have children. But many girls are choosing to have babies with boys who they know aren’t going to be around.
Do we really know what love is? Do we even want to find it? Have we all been broken and judge to many times and scared that we may actually find it.
As said in gentlemen prefer blonds, Lorelei lee wants to marry a man with money, not because she’s a gold digger, but because with money, they can concentrate on loving one another. “Don’t you know that a man being rich is like a girl being pretty? You may not marry a girl just because she is pretty, but, my goodness, doesn’t it help? And if you had a daughter, wouldn’t you rather she didn’t marry a poor man? You’d want her to have the most wonderful things in the world and to be very happy. Oh, why is it wrong for me to have those things?” I once read that the devil places all life distractions to obstruct us for loving one another (I.e. Work, party’s, social obligations etc.) but even if you believe in God or not, this is true to today’s living. We’re so tired when we come home from work that it effects home life, which in turn affect how we love each other, and this doesn’t just relate to relationships, it also comes in to it’s own with friendships.
We all want love right!?, but it has to be that pure love, where no one is out to gain. Where we can trust each other, communicate and confide. Where we can be examples to our children, there’s a saying that be the man or woman that you want your child to come home with.
But is this all installed into us from when we are born. We will first want what ours parents have; our children’s movies and programs will back this up. Then we will again see it in our teenage years but with the heartbreak thrown in, in the form of the cheating boyfriend (letting you know that it’s wrong) and in our adult lives, we have copious amounts of romantic movies. I can’t lie; the monogamous relationship is a multi million pound business. Restaurants, gifts, holidays, weddings. All things expected in a relationship, then you’ve got all the holidays where gifts are to be exchanged. We don’t really know the origins, but social pressures dictate we should, also backed up by advertising, media and yup, all the movies and programs we’ve seen since we were little tots. We subconsciously desire it. Through knowledge and not knowing the origins, were happy not to participate, but feel joy if we do receive anything.
But then Greek mythology says were once a creature with two heads and was split apart in two, thus comes your soul mate theory. Do we subconsciously go around trying to find our soul mate?
These are just my thoughts on the subject, theory’s that I wonder if true or not. Love could be more prevalent within different cultures and backgrounds. Being liberal isn’t as ‘pc’ as it used to be. The are still stigmas attached, but yet it seems more accepted.
Love and kindness are missing, and it’s hard to find two people willing love each other and work at keeping the love between them.
X Kimona x
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